Frequently Asked Questions

WHAT IS A SACRED INTIMATE? SACRED INTIMACY?

Everyone who is a practicing Sacred Intimate might have a slightly different answer to this question. The short version when I am asked this question is, “I provide a safe and open container for my clients to explore and experiment with their own individual erotic expression.”  And that is usually the beginning of a conversation.

One of my colleagues, Don Shewey describes Sacred Intimates like this,

“What does a sacred intimate do? I like to say that sacred intimates combine the roles of priest, prostitute, and psychotherapist. In other words, they approach sexuality with the understanding that it’s related to soul work and to spirituality. They use mindfulness and integrity to help people identify, embrace, and practice desire as holy, sexual embodiment as an expression of the soul. They hold the body as sacred and view erotic energy as a crucial component of human life and spiritual health. Their primary intention is that of healing — and by healing I mean not just addressing the wounds to the spirit and the flesh caused by sexual abuse, addiction, or disease but also acknowledging that the fun and the pleasure, the vitality and the divine mystery of sex have nourishing properties in and of themselves. That’s a message that easily gets lost in a culture that is as ambivalent or sex-negative as ours.” ~Don Shewey (“Sacred Intimacy“)

You can also hear me talk about my work as a Sacred Intimate on some great podcasts including: The “O” Word with Anya de Montigny. Sex Gets Real with Dawn Serra, the good folks at Brown Chicken Brown Cow , and most recently on the Queer Spirit Podcast with Nick Venegoni. (click the titles to hear the ‘casts).

 

WHAT IS TANTRA?

When you hear the word “Tantra” you probably immediately think about sex. In the West, Tantra has become synonymous mysterious ways to be sexual, to harness your sexual energy, and to find prolonged erotic experiences. But that is just the tip of the iceberg.

Tantra is so much more a philosophy for living that includes sexuality as an essential part of the human experience. For me, it is a personal, as well as professional path. Where other spiritual teachings and religions challenge us to renounce pleasure and experiences of the body as distractions to “enlightenment,” Tantra invites us to consciously embrace our time on this physical plane as the path to wholeness, happiness and fulfillment.

In Sanskrit, Tantra means the “loom” or “to weave.” That is one reason that I find it useful as the foundation of my work as a Sacred Intimate. I call my practice Integral Eros because, as in Tantra, I know the essential importance of acknowledging the erotic or the life force and “weaving” into every aspect of our lives.

If you would like to know more about Tantra the following resources are a good start. They include: Urban Tantra by Barbara Carrellas (great beginners’ guide) and for something a little meatier Tantra Illuminated by Christopher Wallis.

 

 

WHAT HAPPENS DURING A SESSION?

There is no simple answer to this question. You can find a couple of suggestions about were to begin on my “Offerings” page, but that is hardly the scope of where a session can take us.  Each session is different, even if we explore the same type of offering over and over again.

The truth is, that it really depends on what you are seeking in your own erotic awakening. It can be challenging to many of us to know what that exactly is.  I can assure you that as we work together the answers to this question will become apparent, and more than you know now they will be unique to you!

 

DO YOU WORK WITH WOMEN? COUPLES?

YES and YES! I don’t discriminate among gender, sexuality or body types. Everyone deserves to find erotic agency and sexual expression that is right for them. To that end I am committed to working with all bodies and identities. If you have a particular question about what time with you or time with you and your partner will look like, please get in touch on my contact page. We will take it from there.

 

HOW DO I FIND OUT ABOUT WORKSHOPS AND TRAININGS?

The easiest way to keep abreast of upcoming events is to subscribe to my newsletter. You can find the subscription link at the bottom of my Homepage. Or simply check out my calendar and events page. I try to put all of my upcoming teaching engagements, workshops and travel out in a timely fashion so that you can catch me wherever I might be.

 

DO YOU TRAVEL OUTSIDE OF SAN FRANCISCO?

Yes, I do! I travel to many places around the country throughout the year. You can keep up with me by subscribing to my newsletter. You’ll find the subscription link at the bottom of my Homepage. Or simply check out my calendar and events page. I try to put all of my upcoming teaching engagements, workshops and travel out in a timely fashion so that you can catch me wherever I might be.

I am also available to travel to you for custom full-day/multi-day intensive sessions.  We can discuss details on request.

 

WHAT ARE YOUR RATES?

You can find all my rates, and some other information about what to expect during our time together on my offerings page. If you have further questions, you can always get in touch via the Contact form and I will get back to you as soon as possible.

 

CAN WE SPEND MORE THAN 2-HOURS TOGETHER?

Indeed, we can! Some of the deepest work that I do with my clients happens in 4-hour and full-day sessions. You can find out more on the Offerings page under Erotic Healing Intensives. Or, get in touch and let me know what you are interested in exploring.

 

ARE YOUR RATES NEGOTIABLE?

They are not, but I do try to keep some session time open for people who are truly in need of my work, but may have some financial hardship.

I have put a lot of time and thought into the value of my work in the world, and how that compares to the work of others, whether it is automotive maintenance, legal representation or the skills of a barista at my local cafe. Please consider the things that you value so much that you wouldn’t ask about a discount. Is your sexual health and well-being one of those things? It is to me!

 

CAN I BOOK A SESSION SAME DAY?

The early bird gets the best session!

My time with you is important to me! I want to make sure that I am available to you as fully as I can be, and that we begin incorporating intention and consciousness into our interactions before we are even in the same room.

To that end, I require a minimum of 24 hours notice for session inquiries. Even after you’ve contacted me via email, we will need a little time for an initial phone consultation before we confirm an appointment.

And honestly, my schedule is full sometimes weeks in advance. I would hate to miss you.